10/25/2026

The inability to distinguish between personal discomfort and actual mistreatment is often where accountability goes to die.

I’ve been guilty of just this in the past. Often, and even recently, I assumed I was being mistreated in a situation that made me feel uncomfortable. Not uncomfortable because I was violated in body, mind, or practice; but uncomfortable, as in, the feeling you have when something or some action is “unfavorable” to your life, agenda, or expectations.

Now, I’ve been betrayed. And in those circumstances, I would attribute the actions of others as mistreatment. Even then, though, was I betrayed by them or was I betrayed by who I thought they were? What I thought they owed me? There is a difference.

If I didn’t vocalize who I thought they were to me. How I perceived their loyalty to be to me. Was it really betrayal? Or did I set myself up for failure?

Both things can be true, but I imagine those instances are the exception.